Email: jonothon@soulteacher.co.uk

I am an heretic of the system, because "I choose". That I am able to form my own judgement and views. That I stand up and take action, against those that want to remove the ability for us to make this choice. That I can no longer be a drone or slave, and submit to the consumerist dogma and elitist worship, that being myself and opposing the system, in fact directly correlates to my survival.

According to the system, I have Bi-Polar disorder. However, I feel it has somehow contributed immensely to who I am as a conscious being and perhaps saved my life, on Earth anyway.

Half the time, I am 'depressed'. I am using only, or predominantly, the left side of my brain, the side of logic and patterns. I have returned to 'reality'. I can at time think there is no hope, having hope provides a brighter future. One day, my left brain hopes that my body, my family and close ones, my dogs, the planet, everything important to me on Earth, will be safe from harm, and is free to play out its routine as programmed. During this time, I can also absorb libraries of information and watch rivers of video's. I process external information very effectively and able to clearly see patterns. This side is very effective for storing information. This side is programmed by yourself and your perception. You can choose what information to take in and what to filter out. Routines are followed out by this side of the brain. You can either choose your own routine and be free, or you can choose a routine that the system dictates to you. As most people are dictated by only this side, when 'depressed' or left brained, I have programmed myself to be a certain way and I use it effectively. To digest useful information, and to follow out routines I have set myself, by the right side of my brain. Also, it is also important to create an ego for my self, to ensure I do not fall back into the ways of the system. That's right (or left), the left brain is your connection to the physical plain, the extension of self. The ego. You programme set routines into this, character traits, Rather than using it to be hypnotized by tv, money, celebrities, diamonds, gold, shiny, material things. It adresses how it needs to survive (etc, a uniform). If you see a character on TV that you like, your left side will filter in some of those character traits. This is why TV, Trends, Advertising, and nights in shining armour, are such a powerful tool of the elite and how everything you perceive effects you. That these external things are important, I choose instead to learn, to educate myself, to take in as much information as possible. So I learnt many things, about the universe, the world, life in general. Watch and read things that are interesting, useful And fed information from my right side, which perhaps my ego couldn't handle. I became depressed and self loathing, but hey, at least I had the weekend. If this side did not foresee a negative world, when left brained, I would never be depressed. It is programmed to believe that we are all slaves to the system, that there are some nasty people in the world who want to control everyone.

The education system is specifically set up to programme you. Essentially, the education system is a manufacturing line, producing a constant supply of drones, or varying skills and qualities (workers, technicians, queens, soldiers, entertainers, etc). Yes, drones, not slaves. A slave knows that they are a slave. A drone is free to go out in the world and do whatever task is assigned to it. It is assigned a task, programmed how to do it and then goes out into the world, performing that task. At one time, I may have been programmed differently, I may have been only using my left brain like most people have been 'dumbed down' to be. To be essentially robots that follow orders, due to lack of right brain activity. Or, who are trained to use their creatively, in meaningless occupations (that keeps us occupied), rather than being allowed to express themselves as they dreamt to be as a child. Or instead waste their creatively doing pointless pastimes (to pass our time), that not are productive to anyone. It is trained to see certain things in a higher regards, it follows a linear time frame, it sees only a single path, from birth to death. It does what it needs to survive by mimicking the flock. It requires orders. It does not think for itself, it does what it is told and follows its programmes. But it is not you, it is the mind. It runs in the background, but keeps a watchful eye, it believes what it perceives to be true, or what it has been told to perceive to be true, and does what it needs to survive. A human being that only believes in scientific facts, results, solid proof, “seeing is believing” would be said to be almost entirely left brained.

“Without order there is only chaos.”

The other half of me, the 'manic' side, the side of intuition, creation. A fearless warrior who can take on the world. That gets it's information straight from the universe itself. That is able to create new thought, new idea's. To write beautiful music. To be of the heart and be themselves. At this time, I can feel like a god trapped in a humans body, like Hercales who struggles to control his compulsions. I experience rampaging spiritual energy bursting through me, I can imagine an entire universe of my creation. I can feel at one with the universe. That I can achieve anything I can think of, as long as I can work it out.

This state creates a potential monster, not scared to do what it wants, when it wants. It got me into trouble in the past, particular when mixed with alcohol or cocaine, I gave up alcohol and man made drugs altogether. Pot, a plant that grows naturally on this Earth. 'Illegal' and classed as drug, actually helped contain the beast. And tea, which is another herb.

It is almost impossible to follow orders. Often upsetting people by being truthful, honest, direct, questioning their beliefs. It's easy to get into trouble by not following orders, or doing as you are told. You are different to everyone else, because you are only being yourself. Being a dreamer, from a young age I was told to get real, to choose a career, so I could never decide what I wanted to do in life and I never will. Because I want to do everything I dream of, express every creative thought, go where I want to, invent things and be able to build them without relying on investment, to experience as much as possible whilst on this earth and become what I believe to be a success on this Earth. Being right brained gives me the boldness to stand up for what I believe in and the energy, the determination, the passion, the idea's, the vision, the aggression, to go with it.

I believe I became bi-polar simply because it gave me guts to overcome my oppressors, to get put a foot down when treated unfairly, to help others in need and not be afraid to hurt myself. I realise that I am a quantum being of energy, that life is just a way of the soul to work itself out and to discover what it' like to feel a variety of emotions. To learn from others that they can not find in their own universe (dreamland). To defy the system, regardless of what the flock think, regardless of the ridicule, being outcast, looked down upon, going without comforts and having absolute no desire for material possessions or money, unless allowing me to express myself creatively in whatever form I choose. The system goes against everything I believe in as a human being and becoming right brained, encourages me to fight for everything I believe in and to stand up for my rights as a human being on this Earth. Now I am aware of the power at the right brain, I interact with the universe more freely and I use this state to implement my ideas and to express myself. During this state, I do what comes naturally to me, or I find I am naturally gifted at certain things, with the left brain helping to refine them.

Being extremely bold in this state but using my wisdom, I naturally become an unelected leader in to those who are open minded, oppressed, weird, kind, good hearted, spiritual, dependant, different, outcast, confused, because I am not afraid to stand up against the system, not afraid to be alone, without friends, without anything, but who could equally quite easily be successful within the system, financially and socially, if so desired. Equally, I am happy for anyone else to take over if their passion so dictates them. In fact, I actively encourage people to be leaders in own right. We should be capable, as human beings of commanding ourselves, without the help of others. But as human beings, we are not born with the knowledge of the universe, or how to survive it. We need to experience because we born of Earth, naïve, without memories of old. Because as souls, we are extremely peaceful, at ease and free. We mentor those who are new to the physical plain, but encourage them to express themselves in whichever form they choose. We pass on the knowledge that helps them to implement such creations. I'm not afraid to tell them the hard truths, but equally provide warmth, love and protection when required. Instead I choose to be myself, speak my mind and not conform.

Ignorant people can build up my anger when in 'manic' mode and I'm not afraid to express my opinion of them. I like to see my self as fair, I respect the opinions of others, as long as it is their own and it comes with support. If they too stand up for their beliefs, whatever it may be. That's how respect should be formed between two human beings. Anyone I can respect can be considered as an equal, as they have 'earned' equality by being human. If they are a parrot, I have no time for them, but sometimes try to help them see logically, even if they can not see spiritually. Those that are merely drones, persons, straw men, corporations. Those pieces of paper. They wind me up, but I do not hate them, I pity them. They are under the spell of a delusion created by magicians, it's not their fault, they are simply afraid of being alone. They just haven't realised that everyone is connected by a universal energy field, we are all from the same source and death is not the end, only another lesson of the soul.

I have now reached a stage where I am not only in complete control of my manic state , use it as force that stands up for the oppressed, enslaved ones, without fear, whilst remaining a peaceful and spiritual, conscious being.

During the 'manic' state I feel that if in a position to actually help the masses, I could do a far greater job, and encourage people to move into a state of sustainability and spiritual thinking. That when manic, my vast intuition and idea's could be implemented, shared. That I encourage people to express there's. That I am so imaginative, I can think of a problem for every solution, and with resources (labour, brain, technology and Earth), capable of implementing a successful working model. And what does the system do to people like me, that has the vision and confidence to think they can save the world. They drugs us, or shoot us, or label us as having some kind of illness or that we are being delusional. But when we are 'manic', we can, there is no stopping us from achieving what we believe in, we are just being restricted.

So in conclusion. I am a spiritual being, who sees there are intelligent slaves out there, who are capable of self management, who wish to free from the restrictions and burdens of the system. We don't need money if the resources are available. We can build our own eco homes, grow our own crops, rear our own animals, treat our own water, recover ourselves form illness, produce our own machinery, make our own fuel. Raise and educate our own children and not birth them as characters, into the corporate slave system.